y2kid:

i will do a lot of things but admitting im cold to my mum who told me to bring a jacket isn’t one of them

(via phobias)

weedjoke420:

one time in 7th grade i was having unbearable intestinal pain like i could not move at all it hurt so bad so i went to the nurse and she sent me home and the second i got home i farted for legitimately 45 seconds and all of the pain disappeared

(via phobias)

gaimez:

One time this girl really hated me and wanted to ruin my reputation or something so one day i was talking to a boy and she came up and really obnoxiously said “you know she has a crush on you right?” and he was like “man i hope so or else this is gonna get really awkward”

She fuckin told my boyfriend that i liked him

(via conflicting)

tbios:

Memorised by accident remembered by choice .
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"I hope you step on a Lego" in fandom language

berryliciouschick:

Harry Potter:
“I hope you kiss a dementor!”

Hunger Games:
“I hope you get reaped!”

Percy Jackson:
“I hope you fall into Tartarus!”

The Fault In Our Stars:
“I hope you light up like a Christmas tree!”

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